Well, hello, my friends. Welcome to today’s episode on indecision. I’m going to be talking to you about. Why you’re experiencing indecision, what it is costing you and how to move past it. So in the previous episodes, I know I’ve given you a lot of things to think about, right? I’ve given you information about what your desire really is, right.
Um, how to unwind, how to start unwinding without having chips in your hand, right. How to feel more confident. In social situations without snacking, and what’s creating your feelings right. How to handle other people. But I know that many of you are still in a place where you’re trying to decide if giving your body a break from sugar and flour is something that you really wanna do.
Okay, now it it’s so common to be unsure. Please know this. I know that I was in this position for such a long time. It, I took probably my first break from sugar and flour when I was in my twenties. Right. And I didn’t consume sugar and flour for, I don’t know, probably like a year. I, and then I started again and then I just kept kind of, you know, flip flopping, you know, sugar, no sugar back and forth.
Right. And I kept going through my twenties and a little bit into my thirties where I just didn’t know what to do and I would occasionally cut back. But then I would start again and I was just like, so undecided. I had all this indecision about what I should be doing. Now you guys, here’s the problem with indecision, right?
It zaps so much time and energy, right? You’re endlessly weighing the pros and cons right. Often not just the pros and cons of right now, but the pros and cons of a future that you envision. And I’ll tell you that that future is usually negative. Right? And so you stay. Nothing is changing. Right. You just keep repeating the same habits over and over again, like you are anguishing over what to do, but nothing is changing.
Right. So it can feel like you’re being productive because you are thinking about it, right. It feels like you are doing so. But you are really not being productive. You are really just staying in place. Here’s the problem. You are not moving any closer to feeling better. In fact, I think for most people being stuck and indecision is one of the most painful things.
You have all this energy that you’re devoting to trying to figure out something in your. But nothing is changing and that uncertainty and that indecision, it doesn’t feel great. Right. And I think a lot of people really hate being in a place of indecision, but they don’t know how to get out of it. So I’m gonna talk to you today about the four reasons why we get stuck in indecision, why this happens and how to try to move away from it because you can, and moving away from indecision will be one of the best and most powerful things that you can do.
So the very first reason that people are stuck in indecision is all about the stories that they have about what it will, what it will mean to change their eating habits. Right. What it will mean to not consume sugar and flour. And I will promise you that those stories are negative. If the stories were positive, if they were seeing a better future, they wouldn’t be stuck in, in decision.
If all your stories about what it means not to consume sugar and flour are pointing you in a negative direct. Well, then I promise you that you are going to continue to be stuck in, in. We also get stuck in this idea that we have to make a decision for the rest of our life. Right. That for me was so incredibly daunting.
Right. Your focus is totally on just making it through day to day. Okay. But really thinking about instead, really thinking about. I’m going to take a break because I want to unwind without needing pizza. At the end of the day, I wanna be able to feel content and feel at ease without needing a tub of ice cream.
Right? So paying attention to learning those tools and that may help you de develop stories for what it will mean to take a break, what it will mean not to consume sugar and flour for a period in your future. That maybe don’t look so bleak. Okay. Now the second thing that holds people back and holds people, or keeps people stuck in indecision is looking to our past to predict our future success.
Right? It’s this idea of while I failed before I have tried before, and it didn’t work. So obviously I’m going to fail again. This is the absolute worst thing that you can. To look at your past for evidence of your future and for evidence of your chances of success. It seems completely lo logical. Okay. It seems logical that I would just look into my past to understand my future capabilities.
Okay. But here’s the problem. Most people see failure. As a sign that they cannot do something. Most people don’t understand failure for what it is, which is part of the learning process. So we look at past attempts and we see that we didn’t succeed and we make that mean that we won’t succeed. We make that mean that we are going to fail.
Instead of understanding, failure is part of learning any skill that you wanna learn, any new skill, including how to decrease your desire, how not to cover up your emotions, how our thoughts create our emotions, but also any skill in the world, driving a car, riding a bike, whatever it. It takes practice. It takes practice, you guys.
It really is our commitment for anything. Right. We have to look at the reason for why we’re doing it versus the reason. Why we’re keeping things the same. And if that reason to change your eating habits, can’t stand up to the reason for continuing to overeat. Then it’s going to be very difficult to stick with your commitment, because it won’t be important enough to you.
You have to believe that you are getting more from changing your eating habits, then from keeping things the. And that is why when I work with people, I really encourage people not to focus on just counting days. Right. I think that is such a fallacy. This idea of, I just need to get a certain number of days.
The problem is that most people after a while, right, the 30 day cleanse or whatever the days are not motivating, right. You get a certain number of days and you’re just saying. Okay. Just one day to the next, just one day to the next, there has to be something bigger, fueling it after a while. It’s just not exciting to cross days off your calendar.
Right. What will it be for me? That is going to be compelling. And what I finally landed on and what worked for me is that I really wanted to be proud of who I was. That was actually very important for me. And I felt like learning these skills, learning how not to use sugar and flour as a crutch. Learning how to rely on myself instead of covering up my emotions, that felt very connected to being proud about who I was, and that actually felt compelling.
Now the reason for you is probably gonna be totally different. And the reason for all of my clients are usually very different. It might mean that, um, you know, they are really interested in just growing as a person. It might be that they’re compelling reason to change their eating habits is that they wanna start to model the behaviors that they wanna teach their children.
And for some people they ha they really feel like. Have a spiritual connection that they want to deepen. They want to deepen a spiritual connection with themselves. Right. It doesn’t matter what it is, right. It just has to be compelling to you. If it’s not compelling to you, if it’s not more compelling, then continuing overeating, then guess what?
The very best thing that you can do is make a decision either way, really honestly, right. Make a decision that you’re gonna take a break or make a decision that you’re not, and that’s fine too.
You, but if you make a decision, either way, I promise you, it will just save you so much mental energy, really. Right. You can just stop going back and forth and stop doing the pros and cons and just use that mental energy for something else. Also stop using your past to predict your future. It really is a terrible, terrible way to predict your capabilities in the future, especially because so many of us really have an unfortunate interpretation of what failure means, right.
We think it means that we’re not going to succeed. And actually failure is part of the process, right? Setbacks are part of the process also. Waiting to take action by telling yourself that you need to be a hundred percent certain, you can, you can take action before you are a hundred percent certain, right.
Waiting to be a hundred percent, certain will keep you stuck. Right. Right. But the biggest thing is really be honest about how sugar and flour is helping you. What is it doing for you? What are the benefits? What are you getting from it? Because when you are really honest about how your eating is helping you then, and only then can you find a truly compelling reason for why you might want to take a break and try learning something?